Asa's 2nd Hospital Stay

After getting to come home two days early from having Asa via a c-section, we thought we were smooth sailing for the holidays! We had a great delivery, and a big healthy boy. He was also nursing very well and was a very relaxed baby! We were in no way prepared for the news we would receive at his routine weight check up following his discharge from the hospital!

To begin the appointment, I was shocked to hear that Asa had lost 1/2lb in two days were he had showed a 2oz gain since leaving the hospital. The night before he did sleep through his middle of the night feeding, and was hard to get to nurse that morning, but I didn't think it would cause that much of a weight loss. The doctor thought the scale might be messed up, so they weighed him again!

When the Dr came in the room she immediately took one look at his rash (which I thought did look worse than the "newborn rash" he had had) and called for another Dr to come in the room. She took his temperature, and it was only 96 degrees! 

She looked very worried and told me that they were going to need to call an ambulance to take us to the hospital because she thought his condition was very serious. She described his rash as being petechiae and that she thought he had an infection in his blood. 

Being in shock, I tried to call Michael, who did not answer because he was in the middle of teaching his class. I called his school and told them I was headed to the ER with Asa, could they please let him know. My sister, who was at the doctor's office with me, went out to get Asa's car seat just as the ambulance arrived. They strapped him in it and then to the stretcher. I said my goodbyes to April and asked her to call my parents then go back to help with Jude and Eden. 

The ambulance ride was surreal. I sent out a group text to a few people letting them know what was going on while I listened to the paramedics talk to the ER about how Asa had sepsis. SEPSIS!?!? Now that was a term I was familiar with and I knew that there was no way Asa was going to survive this. I remember thinking to myself, I have held my child for the last time. 

As we pulled up to the hospital, the paramedics warned me that the next little bit was going to be crazy with lots of doctors around Asa. When they opened the ambulance doors, Michael was standing right there. I was so glad to see him. I don't remember any conversation with him, just that we quickly followed behind Asa and stood in the back of the room as many people surrounded him. 

His temperature had dropped to 95 degrees and he was not breathing good. They put him on a warmer. They took tons of blood and did many tests. About ten different doctors introduced themselves to us. Each time someone new walked into the room, I would think it was a nurse, but it would always be another doctor to evaluate him. 

Once things started to calm down and they got him stable, I asked if I could stand next to his bed. They said that was fine. I remember staring at his tiny body just wanting to pick him up, but I was to scared to even touch him. At this point there was a knock at the door and in walked Pastor Tim and Matt. As soon as I saw their face, I started to cry for the first time. It was like having to realize this was actually happening, while at the same time I knew everything would be ok. Asa's life was in God's hands. If Asa was only meant to live for a few short days, then there was nothing any of the doctors could do to save him. 

While Tim and Matt were there, the doctors came in to do a spinal so I waited outside the room with them. We came back in after the procedure and Tim prayed over Asa that God would heal him. 

Once they left, Asa was still not getting enough oxygen, so they started him on that. Michael and I took turns standing beside him trying to calm him down. They said it would take an hour before he would get used to having the oxygen tube blowing in his nose. 

At this point, I was in pain also! I had had a c-section less than a week before, had no pain medicine since early that morning, and had none with me. Neither of us had eaten all day as well, but we were both too scared to leave Asa's side!

Soon another doctor came in to tell us they were waiting on a bed in the PICU to open up to move us into. 

 Michael was continually reading:

"When I am afraid,

I put my trust in you.

In God, whose word I praise,

in God I trust; I shall not be afraid."

Psalm 56: 3-4a

We knew that whether Asa lived or died God was in control.

It seemed like hours until we were able to move into the PICU (It probably was, we had no concept of time at this point!) I have never even been in a ICU before. But our room was like a fish bowl. It had big sliding glass doors and two windows that looked in where a nurse sat 24/7 to monitor the patients. They would come in a assess him every two hours. 

That night, I tried to hold him once, but his temperature started to drop again, so he had to be put back on the warmer. Michael and I took turns sitting by his bed while the other one would try to get an hour or so to sleep. 

All night he continued to receive different antibiotics and antiviral medications through his IV to try to get a head start just in-case some of his cultures came back with bacteria on it.

That next morning they turned off his oxygen to see if he could breathe good on his own and after 4 hours he proved to be stable, so he was able to have the oxygen tube removed. Then they tried seeing if he could maintain his temperature again and he was able to do that as well! 

We stayed in the PICU all that next day. My grandma and sister were able to stop by to say their goodbyes before they flew back to Florida. The doctor came in that afternoon to tell us we would be able to move into a regular room since he was proving to be stable on his own. 

I thought to take one picture of him in the PICU right before he moved into a regular room!

That night, Michael went home to be with Jude and Eden for a while, while Jenna came up to sit with me. 

Michael's Aunt was scheduled to work the night shift, but was called off, so she offered to stay the night with us and hold Asa so we could get some sleep. (We really must have looked like zombies!) She also woke me every two hours to feed him, since we were trying to get him to gain weight.

That night is oxygen levels would still drop a little too low while he was sleeping. So they decided to check for a heart defect to see if that could be what was causing it.

That next day they did and EKG that showed nothing wrong and all of his cultures came back fine, 

so we were going to get to go home!! (on Thanksgiving Day!)

I have never been so thankful! We went from sepsis to everything is fine in three days! 

My Sweet Asa, 

You will always be my little miracle baby. I guess we will never really know what was wrong with you, but you were a sick little boy for the first week of your life! Thankfully your health continued to improve and now you seem to be perfectly healthy! 

Your Dad and I prayed for you before you were conceived and we were so excited my whole pregnancy awaiting your arrival! And in less than a week, we had praised God for giving us your new life and now we were faced with asking God not to take your little life. I have to admit, I was in shock that this was happening, but I was never afraid. I knew that if God allowed you to die, that your life would still be used to bring Him glory. Because Asa, whether you live 80 more years or if you die tomorrow, you were created for God. 

I love you Asa, and I wish to protect you from all pain, sickness and evil in the world, but I know I am not capable of doing that. Fortunately Jesus can and has. 

So, my sweet little Asa, I will continue to praise God everyday for you knowing you are never really mine to begin with. I will continue to point you to the one that created you. And I will continue to pray for you, that you will learn to know and love God with all your heart. 

I love you sweet boy! You bring joy to my days (and nights) with your bright eyes, fluffy hair, button nose and all the little noises you make. I praise God everyday for blessing me with you!

Love, Mommy

 Asa has gone to a pediatric cardiologist for a 2D Ecco and everything looked good with his heart. However, we will continue to go to the pediatrician's office each week until he is back to his birth weight! He went from 8lbs 5ozs to 7lbs 3ozs. He was 7lbs 10ozs this week! I am doing my best to feed him every 2 hours during the day and every 3 hours at night!